Happiness is a choice....
Its been over a year since i broke up with my partner for 6 years, it was never been easy because we had a daughter (she's turning 6 years old now),everything just turned out from being head over heels in-love up until we fell out of love for each other. Everyone around us thought we were a perfect couple,everyone of them thought our relationship was ok and and nothing wrong was happening, but they were wrong, they didn't know our relationship was suffering from too much difficulties...difficulties that we tried to fixed and gave solution, but it just didn't worked out at all.
During those years we started knowing each other very well,my ex who used to care for me a lot (during our first year of relationship as gf bf) had changed into an "i don't care about you anymore " person since we had our daughter. That was where our problems started. I used to remind him about all his promises he made that he will take care of me until we get old,and his response was always " i'm too tired at work,and i need sometime to rest. " Yes i admit, he never failed to do his responsibilities to our daughter during those times, but he failed and forgot his responsibilities to me as his wife (live in partner rather) .
He was always complaining about him getting tired from work and I felt like the blame was always on me. I was on my college years that time, I was a student/mother, I do homework, need to study my lessons, review for exams, and at the same time take care of our daughter, do laundry and dish washing, cook and clean, in short i do all the household chores...But i never complained in front of him, instead of complaining and starting an argument with him, I just cried all alone and kept all of those pains and sufferings inside of me. He never recognized those sacrifices i made, he always thought that he was the only one who was sacrificing. And what hurt me a lot was the fact that he never utter the word "marriage/ wedding/ settling down etc. ". The time came when I realized I was too tired on our relationship, I was never appreciated, He didn't cared about me anymore, so i thought there were no more reasons to stay on that relationship.
That was the time i started treating him cold. At first he didn't noticed ( 'coz he didn't care) until he finally did! And he asked me why i was acting such. And I told him the truth, that I fell out of love because the way he was treating me for the past years,so I asked for separation, at first he was hesitant, because of our daughter but maybe then he realized that it wont gonna work out anymore, so we made an arrangement to be just friends,and being friend with him worked out a lot better than being in a relationship with him. I knew it was a selfish decision, and it turned like i didn't care about my daughter's feeling at all,BUT it was the best decision i made in my life, i remember what my separated friend told me years ago, "staying on a relationship because of your child is not a good idea at all when u knew yourself that you are no longer happy. " And she was right! My life is less stressful now as compared to the life I had years ago.
Right at this moment our daughter is in my custody.I know I can't explain to her right now about what happened between me and her dad because she's still can't understand , but soon I will tell her, when she's already at the right age to understand things like those . I'm letting her to be with his dad at least once a week and everything turns out really well.
Life is too short, each and everyone of us deserves to be happy, if you know you're not being valued anymore by the person you valued most, walk out to their lives. Because you deserved to be treated more than how they are treating you.
